See these pretty bottles of simple syrup? They were recently spotted at a Southern California coffee joint, selling for $7 apiece. That’s criminal.

You can buy the fanciest, organic, angel-kissed whole cane sugar for 18 cents per ounce and turn into simple syrup in less time than it takes to order a half-caff-frozen-mocha-macchiato-with-double-whip-and-sprinkles. Making enough simple syrup to fill that $7 bottle will cost you a buck fifty, tops.

We’re fans of simple syrup here. As our own @sloganeerist once said: 

Here’s the thing about most liquor and fruit juices: They ain’t sweet. And we like sweet, don’t we? Balls yeah. How else do you explain Boone’s Farm? Thankfully, Jesus gave us simple syrup. Because Jesus knows the secret of a great cocktail: Balance. 

Cocktail Jesus also gave us the keys to the simple syrup kingdom:

1 cup sugar
1 cup water

Stir over medium heat until the sugar dissolves. Let it cool, then pour it into a glass container with a lid (got a used pasta sauce jar? that’ll do). Store it in the fridge until it gets cloudy or smelly.

And some variations on the stupid-simple method:

#1: Add a tablespoon of vodka as a preservative.

#2: Some people prefer 2:1 (sugar:water) because it’s sweeter and a little velvetier. If you’re one of them, by all means, sugar up.

#3: Use Demerara, turbinado or even brown sugar for a richer flavor. It makes a darker golden syrup that’s nice in rum and whiskey drinks.

#4: Make honey syrup: 3 parts honey, 1 part water.

#5: Toss in a handful of rosemary or lavender sprigs, then strain the syrup after it cools. This also works with mint, basil and sage, but you’ll get a sharper flavor from those leafier herbs if you muddle them fresh instead.

BONUS: Every time you make your own, you get to put the $5.50 you saved into your top-shelf liquor fund. The less you spend on syrup, the more you can spend on the stuff that counts.

Still not convinced? Get out of our bar, Richie Rich.

Posted at 11:51am and tagged with: recession drinking, Kim, recipe,.